Kailey Johnson
"Break"
Psychologically needed a break
From calamity
Highly attached
To the brightest light
Hopefully one’s not a fly
And is dismembered by the hands of light
Cause this time
Its real
Psychologically needed a break
From calamity
Highly attached
To the brightest light
Hopefully one’s not a fly
And is dismembered by the hands of light
Cause this time
Its real
"Abide"
I abide by my lucidity
The never ending desolation has dawned upon my consciousness
It's pride
Pride in the most miniscule but most objectifying themes
They told me
You are never not seen as ungratified
They reminded me
What lies behind the white door
My faith in my psyche
My hope in success
Living of other conjectures
I abide by my sanity
Lacking ignorance of my own persona
Knowing the ambition
Ambitions far from expected capability
They told me
You always are seen beaming
They reminded me
What it means to be capable
I am more than average
I produce intelligence
Is this really expected happiness?
I abide by my strength
Each event makes me stronger
But I have realized
Not everything is easy to push aside
They told me
Learn to get over things
They reminded me
You are an honors student
Pride
Capability
Strength
Becomes tiring
Becomes hard
Including the beaming smiles
"Why am I apologetic"
Why am I apologetic
For feeling
I have never felt before
The motions
They thought I was off
Cold
Seven years of blank eyes
Gone
I merely existed
The present
There were no human qualities
It's dark
Could hurt a face of purity
And feel nothing
But I feel presently
Why am I apologetic
For change
I stuck with desolation
Embraced chaos
Lived a life to forget life
Like dad
Will he drink again
I did
My mind died
The past
There were no morals
Nothing could hurt me
Change is inevitable
But I embrace change presently
Why am I apologetic
For love
I didn't believe existed
Not true
Conjecture of lies
From the loved
But this one matches my intelligence
How fitting
It took one glance
Then I smiled
Love is indifferent
But I know love presently
Why am I apologetic
For this
He has changed perception
Broken a wall
Now it's time to grow
Better
He is my blueprint
Trust
But why am I apologetic
Not to him but myself
I was missing out
Now I know